The Council Method

I really like the idea of the council method for married couples and families. This is my third class from Brother Williams and my third time discussing and learning about the council method. I really would love to do this with my husband. The few times we have tried I noticed that the week went a lot smoother. I think my biggest reason for not doing this regularly is that he is such a busy man. I feel bad taking time away from his homework. But I think things would go a lot smoother if we had an opportunity to get on the same page every week.

The council method follows this pattern.

Before the meeting an agenda is made of the topics that will be discussed. This prepares the participants for the meeting.

At the time of the meeting the pattern goes as follows

Expression of love and concern for those in attendance
Prayer
Discussion of items on the agenda
Prayer
Eat a treat!

I really like how this idea is so different than what is commonly taught in books and magazines. The biggest C word for marriage tips next to Communication is Compromise. That is the "key" to a successful marriage. But as I thought about it I realized that compromising and just meeting in the middle means you both give up what you want, neither of you are happy, and it isn't necessarily what is best for your family.

The beautiful thing about the council method is that it is based on consensus. No final decisions are made until all members of the group feel good about it. Each member of the group (either a couple discussion or a family one), takes turns expressing what they feel should be done with the particular item on the agenda. They each take turns and no decision is made until each member feels that the decision is best.